New Metropolitan Police Commissioners Choice of Uniform for Policewomen.
Jeremiah Axeman interview the new Metropolitan Police Commissioner.
Jeremiah Axeman.
So you are the New Metropolitan Police commissioner are you?
Archibald Different.
That’s absolutely right.
Jeremiah Axeman.
What makes you think you are qualified for the Job?
Archibald Different.
Er the Home secretary I think.
Jeremiah Axeman.
That’s as maybe, but there is a great deal of criticism of your appointment.
Archibald Different.
Ah well there will always be complaints.
Jeremiah Axeman.
But it is true is it not that until yesterday you were in fact just a constable.
Archibald Different.
Er yes, A. Different Constable that’s me.
Jeremiah Axeman.
And now you are A Different Metropolitan Police Commissioner.
Archibald Different.
Well they needed a different one because the last one resigned.
Jeremiah Axeman.
Yes we noticed: I think the biggest question most people are asking is why the Home secretary chose you?
Archibald Different.
Er that’s a bit difficult to say sir, er Mr Axeman, though whilst she was on her knees pleading, she did say something along the lines of, all the usual candidates having either resigned, being too tied up with investigating police corruption, or under investigation for Police corruption.
Apparently she had also asked a number of chief inspectors and inspectors but they had apparently said that they wouldn’t touch the job with a ten foot disinfected barge pole. Or at least until the current problems are sorted out. The only other realistic candidates have all been offered jobs with the Thimes.
So I was in fact the last member of the Metropolitan Police that she had asked.
Jeremiah Axeman.
Er well given all the problems, why did you accept the job.
Archibald Different.
It was either that or compulsory redundancy.
Jeremiah Axeman.
So the job offer represented more job security did it?
Archibald Different.
Er well marginally yes, though it is hard to tell in this climate.
Jeremiah Axeman.
Quite: I have to say that if you are Metropolitan Police Commissioner Material then I’m Lady Gaga.
Archibald Different.
WWWOOOooowwww!
Jeremiah Axeman.
PUT ME DOWN AT ONCE!
Archibald Different.
Just a minute, turn round, (Thoughtful pause) Your not Lady Gaga.
Jeremiah Axeman.
Of course I’m not you fool. And you think you have a chance at making this new job work.
Archibald Different.
I certainly do.
Jeremiah Axeman.
What an imagination you have.
Archibald Different.
I thought you were Lady Gaga, you can’t get a better imagination than that can you.
Jeremiah Axeman.
I think that about says it all ladys and gentlemen: Goodnight.
Transremaxculver 